Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
