Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
the liver wants what the liver wants
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize
