What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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