i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
im holly from the hills drunk
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Randomize