Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
your room smells of hookers.
And success
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
