forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
