No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Randomize
