wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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