Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
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