I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
