bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Randomize
