More tranny stories later!
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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