how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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