Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
