Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
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