im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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