Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
