For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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