O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
There's always time for handjobs
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
