I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
