Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
