what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Thank you for not boning my boss.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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