He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
i believe in u and ur pee
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