If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
