I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
