But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
