No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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