I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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