I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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