Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
