you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize