Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
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