Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
