More tranny stories later!
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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