the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize
