Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
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