mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
