matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
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