Who did Billy Mays play for?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
