i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
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