my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
