do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Randomize
