5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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