my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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