I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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