ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
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