you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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