im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
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