Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize