Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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